2003-03-26

Word up, Mr. Chr�tien! That crusty ol� frog is making me proud to be a Canadian these days.

However, there are drawbacks to living in this great nation�s capital. One of the bigger ones being the bus system. Because above and beyond the egregious inefficiency inherent in the system, the bus drivers are MEAN motherfuckers. They�d poke you in the eye with a sharp stick soon as look at you. They�d give you a vicious paper cut with a transfer and then piss on the wound. They�d run over a fucking blind man�s guide dog and LAUGH. They are stone cold. I swear they must go to some hard core bus-driving boot camp, where they have to careen those long slinky buses around tight corners all day while R. Lee Ermey screams at them. �You can�t make it to the bus stop on time? Fuck you! I see you running behind the bus, motherfucker, but I take no pity! Pity is for the WEAK! You�re on crutches and you have trouble getting to your seat? Fuck you! I�m moving this bus whether you�re sitting down or falling down! Fall in the aisle, motherfucker! Waiting around while cripples sit their crippled asses down is for the WEAK! You can give your soul to Jesus, but your ass belongs to OC Transpo!�

Minus all the yelling? I�m not exaggerating. This very morning I was on the bus � which was nearly empty, incidentally � and just as the bus was starting to move, two people ran up alongside. They were at the door. I watched the bus driver: he looked at them in the mirror and just kept on movin�. Last week I was on the bus and the driver took off like a bat out of hell while someone was hobbling down the aisle on crutches, very nearly pitching them to the floor. And a while back I actually had to help a disabled person get on the bus myself, because the bus driver wouldn�t get off his lazy ass. Seriously. The guy was in line ahead of me. He had some sort of walker, and when the bus pulled up, the bus driver just looked at him. The guy had to turn around and ask me to help him get the thing on the bus and collapse it down. I was so surprised I didn�t even have the presence of mind to make some bitchy comment to the motherfucking lazy bastard. Or to the bus driver.