2004-04-29

�Yes, headdress and veil are included, but the do-rag stays with me.�

So great.

Also great: travel mugs! This is a whole new thing for me. I just got a travel mug, and the whole concept is just fantastic � mobile liquid consumption! What a thing! Modern technology never ceases to amaze me. Now I can drink tea on the bus; at least, I could, if Ottawa bus drivers hadn�t all been trained at the Starsky & Hutch Driving Academy. I have to hold my silver canister gingerly, as though it were a containment unit for deadly anthrax spores, lest a particularly sharp corner land me with a scalding faceful of Vanilla Hazelnut (�Gaaaaah! The ginger root is BURNING MY EYES!�). Anyway, it keeps my hands warm.

Today I�m writing a letter of recommendation for myself, to be signed by my landlord, so that English people won�t be afraid to rent to a crazy North American. (�To Whom It May Concern: Robin Smith is an exemplary tenant. She generally refrains from discharging firearms on the premises after dark, except on special occasions.�) I hate doing this kind of thing. I�m incapable of singing my own praises unless I�m being sarcastic, thanks to some convoluted mixture of Protestant modesty and British genes; and I find myself cringing at phrases so effluent as, �She has not been the cause of any complaint or disturbance.� Golly! Jeffrey Dahmer�s landlord couldn�t have put it better.