2004-03-16

Best snippet of conversation overheard today:

�Why do I get the sense that everyone is stupid and ugly?�

Dude, if I could answer that, I�d have�well, even fewer friends than I do now.

But what I really want to know is this: will kitten sweatshirts ever be reclaimed in the name of fashion irony? It�s the next logical step in meta-fashion; it would usher in the new post-post-post-modern era of self-conscious style. Ironic clothing is in desperate need of a breath of fresh air � the �pretend hick� look has been Indied to death. �Look at my mesh-backed baseball cap! I�m a yokel! Except not really!� And now it�s become such established irony that it�s no longer ironic, and it has become Ashton Kutcher, which isn�t cool no matter how much your roll your eyes.

Kitten sweatshirts are the next It thing, I�m here to tell you. Here are a few potential ensembles for you to step out in the next time you�re gadding about with the local scenesters:

Floral-print leggings with �It�s not PMS, I�m always bitchy� T-shirt. No added irony points if you�re a boy, because that�s just SO facile.

Teal blazer with shoulder pads, accessorized with nautical-print scarf and gold-plated �guardian angel� broach.

Denim jacket with Mickey Mouse appliqu�, worn over stirrup pants with Keds.

And the classic: Pink sweatshirt with �Kitten in basket� motif, paired with pleated corduroy pants.

You�ll be hailed as a pop culture visionary. Trust me!