Newest Archives Contact Guestbook Profile Photos Host

2003-12-09

Thanks to the disconcertingly large number of you who gave helpful tips on the correct use of wax paper: I�ll sleep better knowing that wax paper should be used for crafts-related purposes, and for non-stick reinforcement only when tucked safely away in baking tins under baked goods such as cakes; I won�t sleep any better knowing that I am apparently a complete moron who should have her license to cook revoked. It�s surprising I don�t just forget not to die, really.

Tonight I am looking sadly at the empty spot in my fridge where beer should be. I had a nut job call the Minister�s Office today: a full-blown �the foreigners are taking our jobs� lunatic. Fortunately he was a relatively polite one, but he kept me on the phone for a good twenty minutes insisting that I somehow get the Minister to take care of the job-stealing-foreigners situation (�Hang on, I�ll just get my can of Immigrant-B-Gon, and with a few quick squirts � voila! Go forth, young man, and pick lettuce to your heart�s content!�); he was also not having any of me not immediately transferring him to the Minister�s executive assistant. He claimed not to have a home number, and so was not content with someone calling him back, and he was weirdly reluctant to leave his last name or e-mail address � I�m sure he thinks that if he divulges such personal information to an operative of the Evil Overlords, his data profile will be pulled up on our Super Computer, and with one decisive keystroke he�ll be off to Happy Fun Time Reprogramming Camp. What a moron. Obviously, we can do that just by tracing his vocal signature.

previous | next